Watch Out, White House! Here Comes Barron Trump

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Finally! After living alone in the personal quarters of the White House since his inauguration in January, President Donald Trump will be reunited with his family soon.

According to Fox News, a White House senior official has confirmed “President Trump’s wife and their young son will officially be moving into the White House this summer, following the end of the school year.” And, relatively speaking, that’s right around the corner!

While Melania‘s much-delayed, long-awaited arrival in the White House is certainly causing a stir, we think the appearance of Barron, 11, is worthy of attention, too. Why? Because it will mark the first time a young boy has inhabited the White House in over 50 years.

Apparently Barron has already begun mapping out some of the good times he’ll have there. According to the New York Daily News, “Barron has been asking some of his school friends to stay for cool White House sleepovers. He has said to his parents, ‘I hope there are bedrooms for my friends to come visit.’” Fun!

Well, we think the 55,000-square-foot White House, with its 132 rooms, has plenty of space for Barron’s buddies and then some. This means the White House staff should be on their toes.

Because, as any elementary school teacher could tell you, boys do tend to be more rambunctious than girls. And when “home” happens to be the White House—which is filled with $160,000 million worth of artwork and historical artifacts—that could result in some very expensive damage.

As proof, take a look at some of the boys who called the White House home in the past:

• John F. Kennedy Jr. was the last little lad to call 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. home, entering the White House with his family in 1961 as an adorable newborn. Later on, he made his presence known as a boisterous toddler. On the rare occasions the little tyke was allowed into the Oval Office, he’d play behind a secret panel in his father’s desk that opened like a small door. (It was the “Resolute Desk,” the same one Trump is using today.) According to the 2000 biography “John F. Kennedy, Jr.,” “there are numerous stories of how President Kennedy might be discussing matters of state with cabinet members of foreign dignitaries when John would unexpectedly pop out from beneath his father’s desk.” Cute, but also potentially catastrophic if some visiting foreign leader had a heart attack as a result, right?
• Abraham Lincoln‘s sons, Willie and Tad, were 10 and 7 when they moved into the White House in 1861. And clearly Tad was the troublemaker of the two. To amuse himself, he once herded pet goats through the East Room where Mom was entertaining guests. At another point, he rigged the White House’s “bell” system (used back then to alert staff) to go off all at once.
• Even worse were Theodore Roosevelt‘s four boys, who were aged 4 to 14 when they came to the White House in 1901. According to the Washington Post, “Some say the 224-year-old building still shivers from the punishment Roosevelt’s four sons gave it.” For instance, the boys slid down the stairs on kitchen trays. They staged water fights on the roof. The youngest, Quentin, even flung spitballs at a painting of Andrew Jackson (at least he was forced to clean up his own mess and not allowed to see his friends, dubbed the “White House Gang,” for a week).

What will Barron do?

Now to be fair, the oft-besuited Barron seems more reserved than rascally, from what we’ve seen. But just in case he’s more rowdy than he’s let on so far, is there anything the White House can do to “boy-proof” itself?

“As the mom of a same-aged boy whose toilet flooded our two-story house, I can speak to this topic,” says Texas real estate agent Wendy Flynn. “Barron Trump already has more media scrutiny on him than he deserves for a child. He certainly doesn’t need to get any more media attention for damaging a priceless object!”

Her advice?

“Setting boundaries—literal and figurative—is essential,” Flynn says. “Most 11-year-old boys want to please their parents and other authority figures, and they’ll respect those boundaries. Staff at the White House may want to make some areas off-limits to children to ensure priceless items are protected.”

That said, Flynn thinks it’s also important “to give an 11-year-old boy places to explore and investigate, places to get messy and dirty.”

In other words, go ahead and let Barron run around the White House sunroom or Michelle Obama‘s garden, but keep the Oval Office off-limits. It sounds like Melania might have her work cut out for her.

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